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Creating Your Own Safe Haven

Childhood

As a child, I’ve spent most of my time outdoors as I was lucky enough to grow up on the countryside surrounded by nature. Because of this, I have developed a strong bond with nature that has lasted all the way through adulthood and will probably stay with me until I die.

Why am I telling you this? Whenever I need a break from work or life, I find peace and relaxation in nature. Although I currently don’t live in the countryside, there are certain places I go to when I want to take a break and feel like relaxing.

These places are so powerful that they always bring me peace, happiness, and relaxation. When the wind blows in my face, it feels like stress, worries, and negative emotions disappear.

Creating Your Safe Haven

Creating a place where you feel relaxed and peaceful can help you cope with difficult situations or through tough periods in your life. It doesn’t need to be a desolate place in the middle of nowhere.

It depends on who you are and what you like. For some people, it can be a small park in the city, a cozy coffee shop, a football pitch, or just your living room.

If you don’t have a place where you feel completely relaxed and free of stress, it might be interesting to look for one. There are lots of places that can bring relief after a day of hard work or on a Sunday afternoon. Before you go looking for such a place, ask yourself the following questions:

  • Where was I most happy as a child?
  • When do I relax easily?
  • Who makes me feel at ease?
  • We Are All Conditioned

The first question has everything to do with conditioning. What I mean by that is most people associate certain scents, flavors, and feelings with specific emotions. As a child, I was happy being outdoors getting dirty in the forest or chasing rabbits :-). The result is that I have come to associate nature with happiness.

For you, it could be the smell of coffee or the feeling of the sun on your face. Really, it can be anything. Go through your childhood memories and look for those moments when you felt really great and happy.

If your childhood wasn’t all that great, don’t worry. Look for any moment in your life you felt happy, relaxed, and in balance. The power of childhood memories is that most of us were happy as a child and these associations with scents, flavors, or environments have become ingrained.

Timing Can Make The Difference

The second question is slightly different. Some people can truly enjoy getting up early when the rest of the world is still asleep. Other people, however, feel most relaxed at the end of the day, when they know that all that had to be done is done.

Why is this important? It makes it easier for you to relax. To give you an example, even though I like getting up before the break of dawn, I often go cycling just before sunset. At that time of day, the light is amazing and it gives me such a relaxing feeling. So, find out when you are most likely to feel relaxed and at ease, and give it a shot.

We Are Social Animals

A lot of us truly relax when we are surrounded by people we love, husband or wife, mother or father, our children, or a special friend. Cherish the people that make you feel comfortable. The feeling that you can trust these people is invaluable. Tell them they give you a warm feeling if you like. People appreciate it when they know they are treasured.

My grandmother’s house used to be such a place because she was such a nice and warm person. Caring for other people seemed to be the only thing that mattered in her life.